Week 139 // Introvertigo

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Good gracious
You burn your own pages
You cut your own wages
There’s something up

Causing trouble
You burst your own bubble
You’re never so subtle
You get enough

So then you try to turn a phrase
But you’re really just turning the wheel
You think you’ve got a lot to say
Then I’m sure you will, yes you will

Whenever you’re alone
It’s your chance to let it all in
You get it in your heart
Again and again

So you catch your self breathing it in
Yes you catch yourself breathing
You catch yourself breathing
You catch yourself breathing it in
Again and again
Again and again

Good gracious
You’re running in place
Yeah you’re burning up traces
A perfect ten

Some people
They never lose sleep
Over getting it cheap
Are you one of them?

And all your pictures getting old
Yeah you’re fading with plenty to say
And if it makes you lose control
Then you should some day, yes you should

Whenever you’re alone
It’s a perfect revelation
You get it in your heart
Again and again

So you catch your self breathing it in
Yes you catch yourself breathing
catch yourself breathing
You catch yourself breathing it in
Again and again

Ooh you catch your self breathing it in
Yes you catch yourself breathing
You catch yourself breathing
You catch yourself breathing it in
Again and again
Again and again
Again and again

Notes
Not too long ago, I took a Myers-Briggs Type Indicator test online, and I found out something about myself that startled me. In retrospect it seems painfully obvious, but I guess it just didn’t fit my concept of how I fit into the world. It turns out I’m a pretty hardcore introvert. The reason that I was surprised about this revelation was probably our societal misconception of what introversion is. I’m a blast at parties. I run my mouth off. I’m not cautious with my opinions. Extroversion, right? Not necessarily. Introverts process the world internally, and value privacy and autonomy. I do these things. I live an intricate internal life that tends toward solitude in the midst of a few intense personal friendships. Perhaps my miscalculation of myself as an extrovert has lead me to believe that these traits are somehow making me broken. This is a song about the tension within a person who is an introvert, but somehow doesn’t see it. It is a song about better knowing one’s self, and breathing in the fresh air on the correct side of self discovery.

Another note about this song. I found the guitar part, and therefore the bulk of the song, deep deep in my back pocket. I wrote it about five years ago, and intended to play it in my old band, Lightning Bug. It even had lyrics back then, but I’m not sure what they were. It was almost certainly a breakup song of one kind or another, which probably contributed to the band never picking it up. I was writing a lot of those back then, and we ended up throwing most of them away. I think we tinkered with it at one band practice before moving on to other material. I was always a bit disappointed, since I really like it. I continued to tinker with it for several years, but somehow over the past 138 weeks it never occurred to me to use it. So here it is, with a fresh coat of paint, brand new lyrics, and a new lease on life. Sometimes I really love my back pocket.

Here’s hoping your Monday doesn’t totally suck.
~M.E.

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